Happy Friday, my fellow chuckle enthusiasts! Another week has flown by, and here we are, ready to lighten up the evening with some criminally good humor — all without breaking the law (or at least not getting caught). Grab your favorite snack, kick back, and let’s get away with these laughs!
Joke #1:
I asked my wife if she’d seen my newspaper. She told me that newspapers are old school and handed me her iPad. That spider never knew what hit him.
Joke #2:
Why did the bank robber only steal Tide detergent?
Because he wanted to make a clean getaway.
Joke #3:
Did you hear about the kleptomaniac who got caught stealing calendars?
He got twelve months.
Joke #4:
What do you call an alligator in a vest?
An investigator.
Joke #5:
A man tried to sell me a coffin the other day. I told him, “That’s the last thing I need!”
Bonus Limerick:
There once was a thief from Peru,
Who only stole things that were blue.
When asked about red,
He laughed and he said,
“I’m colorblind; who even knew?”
Funny Rhyming Poem:
If you plan to commit a small crime,
Pick one that won’t cost you much time.
Stealing hearts? That’s okay!
Stealing snacks? Walk away.
But forgiveness costs nothing — sublime!
Art Prompt:
Create a surreal masterpiece featuring a courtroom where animals are on trial, with a giraffe as the judge, a raccoon as the defense lawyer, and a parrot loudly objecting from the witness stand. Use Renaissance-style lighting and intricate details to craft an artwork worthy of a million-dollar auction.
Wrap-Up:
That’s all for this week, folks! Don’t forget to check out the latest art over at Lumaiere and subscribe for more laughs every Friday night. Have a fantastic weekend, and remember: forgiveness is divine, but so is a good laugh!