Well, here we are — possibly the final curtain for Friday Night Laughs. Or maybe just an intermission. Or maybe I just accidentally sat on the keyboard again and hit “publish.” But if this is the end, let’s go out with the comedic equivalent of a marching band, fireworks, and a confused duck in a monocle. Buckle up, folks. It’s Joke-o-geddon.
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot?
A carrot.
I told my wife she was drawing her eyebrows too high.
She looked surprised.
I asked the gym instructor if he could teach me to do the splits.
He said, “How flexible are you?”
I said, “I can’t make it on Tuesdays.”
I threw a boomerang a few years ago.
I now live in constant fear.
Someone asked me to name two structures that hold water.
I said, “Well damn…”
And now, a limerick to keep things classy:
There once was a hamster named Doug,
Who napped in an old coffee mug.
He dreamed he was flying,
While actually frying —
Someone mistook him for a bug.
And for those of you who love a longer commitment, here’s a poem that absolutely no one asked for:
Ode to the Joke Drawer
I once had a drawer full of puns,
Next to the socks and the buns.
They lived in the dark,
No spark, no snark —
’Til Fridays unleashed all their guns.
They spilled out with knock-knocks and groans,
Puns made of pure funny bones.
But alas, now they rest,
No jest, just a vest —
Of humor that’s gone to the stones.
Art Prompt:
A foggy morning harbor scene rendered in the style of late French Impressionism. Boats barely visible in the mist, soft pastel reflections shimmering in the water, figures walking along the dock obscured by atmospheric haze. Use broken color techniques and rapid brush strokes like those of Claude Monet in his Rouen Cathedral series. The sky should be diffused with light blues and grays, while the water captures fragments of rust, ivory, and pale rose. Light should feel both natural and fleeting.
If this is the end of Friday Night Laughs, thank you for coming along for the weekly nonsense. If not, well — just pretend this was the season finale cliffhanger. Either way, post your favorite jokes in the comments, follow me for more absurdity, and have yourself a weekend so good, it deserves a laugh track.
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Happy Friday, ya weirdos.